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 Child Discipline

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RoseCandle
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PostSubject: Child Discipline   Wed Aug 13, 2008 2:28 pm

I came across this story in the news and thought it might make a useful/helpful discussion topic.

A man who was arrested and cautioned for slapping his 13-year-old daughter across the face fears he will no longer be able to work with children.
Jim McCullough, of Manchester, hit Jess after she banged a neighbour's window at midnight, and she called the police.

Quote :
Jess, a year nine pupil at Parklands High School in Wythenshawe, said she was sorry for what had happened.
She said: "I did deserve the slapping because of the things I'd been doing.
"I was expecting my dad to come home from the police station and for everything to be the same as before."

Full Story:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/manchester/7558560.stm

Discussion below.

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RoseCandle
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PostSubject: Re: Child Discipline   Wed Aug 13, 2008 2:43 pm

So, what do you all think ?
Are you Pro or Anti slapping and why ?

What other forms of punishment can a parent
use - and more to the point - have you found
them to be effective ?

For example - if you ground your child for a
couple or more nights, does he/she accept it
or take off out of the bedroom window ?
(A friend of mine tried grounding her daughter
and that's exactly what 'she' did.)

Do kids really care if you take away their tv,
or other personal stuff, or stop their pocket money
for a week or two ?

Share with us how you discipline your children and
how effective you have found it to be. You may
help some despairing parent somewhere.

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ichthus
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PostSubject: Re: Child Discipline   Wed Aug 13, 2008 3:38 pm

I have no children of my own.

I have cared for children, but that is 25 years ago. ( I dont believe it, but it is.)

Slapping in those days was quite common in family life, (but strictly forbidden in residential care situations). I am not saying that I never did, (but bear with me). Boys fine, but girls above 8 or 9 never. Then never on an area not protected by clothing.

It breaks down to the relationship between the child and the (substitute) parent. If it is good and the slap is an abnormal thing then the youngster will accept it. But to slap a 13 year old on the face was indeed wrong.

Private televisions were unheard of. To have one in the house was a privilage and when we got a colour set that was a taste of heaven. Personal iPods were not even on the drawing board, a wind up gramaphone was the pitz. To be deprived of either was to be avoided at all costs. I have wonderful memories of the long walks after school before we had tea, or the even longer ones to have a picnic. Things have changed, I am not sure I could cope in this day and age.

Behaviour was not always good, but discipline was there, they knew how far they could go with me. They knew how far they could go with my colleagues. They knew what the word "NO" meant and the consequences of ignorring it. ( I am not even sure now what the consequences were).

The tears and hugs when I left each of the two places I had worked for a number of years are still with me. It was down to the relationsips we had had together.

To sum up, it is down to that relationsip between child and carer.
If the relationship is on good foundations then the youngster will not need that slap.
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